A Wandering Widow

In my eight years as a victim advocate I used the phrase “new normal” with my victims and their families. But what does it mean? Well it means that life will never be the same again. My new life after Kevin passed away resembled nothing of my previous life with him. That’s because we had moved to a new house, in a new town just three weeks before he passed. Our neighbors never even had a chance to meet him.

I took four months off of work to grieve and try to settle into our new life. At first I kept myself constantly busy, which of course is a very common trauma response. If I’m busy, then I don’t have to feel anything. My son Jared and I went to every local event that we could so we could get acquainted with our new town and possibly meet some people.

I discovered a local winery and started talking to the owner and, small world, he knew Kevin’s aunt! It was a sign! (Kev has given me many signs. More to come on that). I very quickly started working at the winery and met some truly amazing people that took us in and treated us like family. As a matter of fact, we spent Christmas and New Years with them.

I have met many new friends and sometimes when I look back I don’t even recognize my old life. I have a new job, new car, new pets (in addition to our old ones). It makes me very sad that Kevin isn’t on this life journey with me physically. But I know he is with me spiritually. I hope that he is proud of the way that I’m living this “new normal”.